In a bleak future, Vin Diesel is assigned to protect a woman who is host to an organism that may become a genetically engineered Messiah. Just an average Saturday for Vin Diesel.
REVIEW ANALYSIS:
One can't help but feel a little bit sorry for Babylon A.D., a movie that's been disowned by its director, ignored by its star and dumped into theatres by its studio during the slowest of the summer's dog days. But as much as I'd like to offer the film some words of encouragement and a pat on the back for effort, I have to concede that it's pretty terrible and not in the "so-terrible-it's-awesome" way of such past late-summer gems as Snakes on a Plane and Neil LaBute's demented Wicker Man remake.
No,
Although the credits claim that Babylon A.D. is based on the popular French sci-fi novel Babylon Babies, the movie more closely resembles a louder, dumber cousin of Alfonso Cuarón's masterful Children of Men—call it Children of Men 2: This Time It's Twins! Vin Diesel takes over the Clive Owen role as a world-weary cynic who learns to care again after prolonged exposure to a mysterious young woman carrying mankind's future in her uterus. In Babylon A.D., this character's name is Toorop and he's a semi-retired human smuggler forcibly brought out of hiding by Russian mob boss Gorksy (Gérard Depardieu) for a high-paying gig.
Toorop's mission, which he has little choice but to accept, is to transport the lovely Aurora (Melanie Thierry) and her guardian Sister Rebecca (Michelle Yeoh) from the Russian wilderness to
Joking aside,
Had Kassovitz (or the editors hired to cut the film on his behalf) actually pursued this thematic thread, it might have made the picture an ambitious failure instead of simply a failure. But any deeper ideas are quickly lost amidst the incomprehensible action sequences, the wooden acting and the nonsensical third act, in which the studio's interference becomes blatantly obvious. (If the last scene makes any sense to you, please post an analysis online so the rest of us can figure out what the heck happened.) We can argue over who is ultimately responsible for this mess until the movie turns up on cable, but the fact is, some films are just doomed to failure from the moment they're green-lit despite the best intentions of everyone involved.
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